# Numerology Compatibility: Can You Use Numerology to Figure Out Who To Date?

Anyone who’s into spirituality and signs from the universe knows that one of the first questions you want answered when you meet someone new is “are we compatible?”

You want to know what the tarot cards say, what the runes say, what your tea leaves say, and of course, if you have zodiac and numerology compatibility.

## Calculate Numerology Compatibility

To figure out if you have numerology compatibility, all you have to do is take your base number, that’s the number of the day of the month you were born, added up to a single digit, and lay it side by side with your partner’s base number.

So, if you were born on a single digit date, that’s your base number. If your date is a double digit, add the numbers together until they form a single digit. That’s your base number.

### Are you compatible?

There are a few ways to tell with numerology.

Keep in mind that odd numbers are typically dynamic, active, expansive, and outward directed while even numbers are static, magnetic, reactive, and more inward-directed. In general, opposites attract, balance being what it is.

But that’s not always true. And, your base number will not always tell you the whole story of compatibility.

Numerology at its most basic has never accurately captured me, nor has the zodiac, and for years I thought it was all a bunch of crap.

Then I learned how much depth there is to these kinds of equations, how birth charts, names, and so much more are involved in truly capturing someone’s essence, life path, and compatibility.

So, if you’re truly interested in discovering if you’re numerically compatible with someone, the best thing you can do is book a session with a numerologist.

### A Note on Compatibility

Until then, after years as a spiritual hippie witch, years of counseling and working with women on their lives, their growth, and their troubles with men, and years of simply observing relationships both close up and from afar, let me give you some advice on compatibility.

There’s this great scene from the movie The Mexican, with Brad Pitt, Julia Roberts, and James Gandolfini, where Gandolfini’s character asks Roberts’ character the following question:

“When you love someone, truly love someone, but you just can’t seem to get it together, how do you know when enough is enough? When is enough enough?”

“Never.”

But here’s the thing about that answer – it has to go both ways.

The greatest sign for me of compatibility is when both people are invested. That’s it.

I have witnessed dozens of relationships succeed for decades and dozens fail after months, years, and decades, and I can tell you firsthand that a relationship lasts because both people want it to.

A relationship fails when one or both person is no longer invested.

That’s it.

It really is that simple.

“The single most important element that leads to divorce in a marriage is contempt.

If you and your partner are not respectful of each other, are not shepherds of each other’s feelings, compatibility is out the window.

## 10 Ways to Measure Compatibility Now

Here are 10 more ways to examine the compatibility of your relationship while you wait for your numerologist session.

### You don’t question the love

You know you’re into him, and you know he’s into you. You’re not guessing at whether he likes you, loves you, wants to be with you.

While mystery in a relationship is great, this is not a mystery to crave.

The Buddha says “if you meet somebody and your heart pounds, your hands shake, your knees go weak, that’s not the one. When you meet your ‘soul mate’ you’ll feel calm. No anxiety, no agitation.”

It feels good to be in love with this person. That’s compatibility.

### You’ve seen each other’s closets

No, I’m not talking about physical closets.

I mean you’ve seen all the skeletons. You know the dark secrets. You know things about each other no one else knows.

That’s love.

### No changes required, thank you

It’s a relationship, a partnership, not a fixer-upper. If you find yourself wanting to change him or you notice he’s trying to change you, walk away. Now.

People certainly grow and change in relationships, but when one person is focused on forcing that change on another, you’re doomed.

### You enjoy time away

From each other. You can go hang with your friends, and he can go hang with his. There is mutual trust and respect for each other’s alone and self-care time.

You celebrate each other when you’re away and then when you come back together.

That’s security and stability.

### You share common interests

Maybe it’s the same movies or genres, maybe you’re both athletic or both lazy couch potatoes on the weekends. Whatever it is, you love that you share that interest.

When you have common interests, you know you will have plenty to do, and talk about, together, for the years to come.

### You have different interests

But you don’t have everything in common! That would get boring fast.

He likes boxing, and you like reality television.

You love hiking and he hates the outdoors.

You need to have some differences, and respect for those differences, to keep your relationships fresh.

### You fight!

Psychologist and professor Jordan Peterson says “conflict avoided is conflict multiplied.”

A truly strong and compatible relationship is one that works through the tough times. You weather your storms, you bring your honest feelings and concerns to the table, and you hash it all out.

It works because you both want it to, remember?

### You inspire each other

If you find yourself wanting to be a better person because of him, that’s a great sign.

This is very different from wanting to pretend to be a better person, or feeling inferior to him because “he’s so amazing.”

No. He inspires you to be better. And you do the same for him.

That’s compatibility.

### The attraction is mutual

“Looks aren’t everything!”

They say it all the time, right? “Oh my God, don’t be so superficial.”

But the truth is, you need attraction in a relationship.

One of my favorite expressions is “there’s a lid for every pot.”

You don’t have to be attracted to him. Someone else will be.

He does not have to find you hot and sexy. Someone else will.

If you don’t have a mutual physical attraction, you are not compatible.

Relationships, the good, strong, stable ones, are meant to last decades, centuries, millennia. You don’t want to spend the rest of eternity with someone you don’t like kissing.

### You are your most authentic self

And finally, you should be able to be yourself, fully and completely. If you can say what’s on your mind, dress as you normally would, pluck your chin hairs, go to bed without makeup on, eat what you really want to eat, and so on and so forth ad nauseum, you are in a good, strong relationship.

Again, why would you want to spend eternity with someone you can’t be all you with?

Be yourself, and watch what happens.

In the end, I would say that these things need to be just for fun. You’re just playing around with tarot or runes or numerology or zodiac when it comes to your relationship.

And it can be really fun!

But if not, if you take all of this too seriously, if you’re turning to the internet and a numerologist for relationship advice, you already know the answer: he’s not the one.

How do I know? Because of number one above: you know you love each other.

If you know you both love each other, and you know you both want it to work, nothing else matters.

Anything, literally anything, other than that, and you’re in the wrong relationship.

I know it can be hard at first, but you have to know you already have all the answers inside.

I spent years wondering why people bothered to call advice hotlines, why people went to psychics, why people asked these deeply personal questions about their lives in front of live audiences.

I never would. Never.

Why?

I did not always know that I knew the answer. But the second I considered raising my hand at an Abraham Hicks conference, I instantly had the answer.

You already have access to all the answers that numerology might give you, that tarot might give you, that a psychic might give you.