A broken heart is something you cannot get through life without experiencing at least once. We have all experienced the grief and loss of a breakup. It is just awful, especially when the relationship gave you that heart throbbing, chest pounding, short of breath, euphoric feeling so common with intense passionate relationships. Of course, when that relationship ends, you feel the opposite extreme of emotions.
You are distressed, distraught, sobbing, and short of breath for an altogether different reason. Loneliness sets in no matter who surrounds you with love among your friends and family, and if you are truly, physically alone, the loneliness can feel endless. You are desperate, and you are looking for affirmations to get your ex back.
Trust a Witch
The first and most important thing to remember when you are trying to get the universe to do anything for you is that you have to believe that what you want actually belongs to you. You have to believe yourself worthy of the thing/person you want. You have to attract what you want through the power of your thoughts.
A witch is someone who works with the energy of the universe. That is the definition of witchcraft: working with energetic forces. “Practicing magic” is really not what most people think of as magic at all. It is a completely practical and evidence-based practice. We trust our gut, you could say. We listen to our intuition. We recognize the necessity of both dark and light forces in the universe, and we learn to use them both to our advantage.
In short, you trust yourself, you higher self. You trust the witch in you to bring the good things into your life.
You Really Want Your Ex Back?
So, the first thing you have to ask yourself is if you really want your ex back. You really believe he is your soul mate? Take some time to think about the relationship you had. Was it a loving relationship? Did you feel validated? Did you validate him? Were you truly suited to each other? Or were you addicted to each other? Were you good for each other? Or was the relationship destructive?
I have worked with many women in my life, dealt with my own heartache and with the heartache of many women, and I can tell you one thing that has repeated itself over and over. Usually, when women want their ex back, it is because they are lonely or needy, not because they actually want him back. Quite often, in fact, they can see where the relationship went wrong in the first place. They see that they settled for him when they should have aimed higher, or that they were too clingy with him when they should have been doing more personal exploration work.
There is a reason you broke up. Before you begin affirmations to get your ex back, before you begin practicing this kind of magic, be sure you really want the thing you think you want and that you are not simply drowning in negative thoughts and reaching for an ex that really was not good for you out of desperation.
Decisions made from desperation are never a good idea.
The Thing About Affirmations
Okay, so you’ve decided you still want your ex back, even after all the self-exploration. You still think it’s a good idea, and not a desperate one.
Here’s the thing to remember about affirmations or any other spell work you decide to undertake: it’s more than just an affirmation. You must do the work.
You must do the work.
People love to conveniently skip over the “doing the work” part and then blame magic, the universe, or, worst of all, the witch, for a faulty spell.
But it’s not the witch. It’s the work.
You cannot cast a spell to lose weight. You must cast the spell and then do the work. The universe does not make things happen for you. The universe works with you to make things happen for yourself. The universe opens the door. You must still walk through it.
Having said that, here are the top 5 affirmations to get your ex back, with the work you must do to align with your affirmations.
Top 5 Affirmations to Get Your Ex Back
- I Am Smart
The work: you must practice being smart every day. Smart can mean different things to different people. Book smart? Read more books. Smart at work? Focus on improving at your work tasks. Street smart? Head out into the world more often. Whatever it is you want to truly believe you are smart at, work on improving your brain in that area every single day. Before you know it, you will believe you are really smart.
- I Am Sexy
Again, sexy means different things to different people. Let me tell you, for sure, what sexy does not mean: skinny. This is not to say that skinny people are not and cannot be sexy. It means that sexy has nothing to do with size. Just take a look at all the different cultural variations on sexy over the years. Kim Kardashian is not skinny. Twiggy was. Marilyn Monroe? Not skinny. Sia is. Sexuality is about feeling good in your own skin.
The work: visualize what sexy really means to you, and then work on it. What do you have to do to feel sexier? Do that, every single day.
- I Am Wealthy
The work: to ensure you are not seeking your ex out of desperation, you need to get to a place where you feel wealthy financially, whatever that means to you. Get better at your job. Get a job if you don’t have one. Switch careers. Find yourself a place in the professional world where you feel abundant, where you can support yourself and buy things you like. It engenders feelings of confidence having your own financial strengths like many other things simply do not. When you say “I am wealthy” every morning, picture what that looks like to you, and then work toward it.
- I Am Independent
I cannot stress this enough: no one wants to be clung to. No one wants to be someone’s everything. We are put on this earth to partner up, not to cling-on. Any man worth his salt wants a strong independent woman.
The work: get a life! Seriously. Get yourself some good girlfriends to hang out with. Spend time with your family. And learn to spend time alone! A woman who loves to be alone with herself is a serious, mysterious, catch. Get yourself to a place where you can look in the mirror and say it out loud: I am independent.
- I Am Worthy of True Love
This one is the most difficult affirmation of all because, if you are desperate to get your ex back, you don’t believe you are worthy of true love. In most cases, if you broke up, it’s not true love. If you believe you are worthy of true love, you would not be pining for something that is obviously not it.
When I was much younger, my mother gave me some words of wisdom as I cried over a boy I wanted so bad. She told me not to ask for this boy in particular, because his heart might belong to someone else. Instead, she told me, ask for someone like that boy. What are all the qualities you love about your ex? Think of those qualities. Think of what made you feel adored and loved. Then, remind yourself that you are worthy of those feelings.
The work: for this one, the work is in the first four steps. When you say this mantra every day, picture all the things you are doing as acts of self-love (yes, those are all acts of self-love) and then remind yourself that every single day you are working to make yourself believe you are worthy of a true soul mate.
Meant to Be
Look, it sounds cliche, but it true. If it was meant to be, it will be, and nothing on earth can stop it. That is just how the universe works. Your destiny will chase you down, knock on your door, and stay there until you open. True love is destiny, and yes, it requires work, but it does not demand desperation. Indeed, desperation keeps that door closed.
The best practice you can put into place is to love yourself through your affirmations and know that if your ex is destined to return to you, the entire world could not stop him. And if all else fails and he never returns, you are a stronger, smarter, wealthier, more independent woman for it all, and the man who does fall head over heels in love with you will be truly up to the task of loving you.