So you’ve found yourself in a situation where you’re feeling vulnerable, weak, or exposed. This can be mentally, emotionally, spiritually, or physically. You’re feeling anxious or fearful, or both, and exposed.
It can be terrifying at first to feel afraid, especially if you feel helpless against the fear. Over time, it can just start to feel frustrating. You’re tired of being afraid, and you want to take action.
What can you do? What actions can you actually take? And what is the best stone to wear for protection? The answer to all of these questions, of course, is it depends.
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When you feel like you need protection, it is because you are feeling vulnerable. Often, vulnerability is seen as a weakness, and it is important to note that it is not.
Vulnerability allows us to open up, to let things go, and to heal ourselves. A large part of the process of getting strong after being hurt or traumatized actually includes allowing ourselves to be vulnerable.
Strong or Hard?
The danger in seeking protection is that we may become hard rather than strong. Once we are hurt, many of us tend to wall up our feelings, place stone fortresses around our hearts, and refuse to let anyone in.
So we hold onto our pain, we encourage our fear and mistrust to mount, and we hold everyone else in suspicion, at arm’s length.
But, as sociologist and author Brene Brown says, “We cannot selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.”
Basically, when we lock ourselves behind a stone wall fortress, with bars on the windows, yes, we might be safe from invaders or anyone who wants to hurt us, but we are also blocking out the joy and the love. We are trapping ourselves inside a prison of our own making.
You want to be strong, not hard.
How to Get Strong
Now, this does not mean that you should allow anyone to victimize you. It does not mean that if someone hurts you, you should let them do it again. It does not mean to be a pushover or a doormat to be trampled on.
It means you must follow the steps to learn to be strong.
- Love Yourself
The first and most important step you can take to becoming strong is to love yourself. When you love yourself deeply, you will not abuse yourself, and you certainly will not allow anyone else to abuse you.
See yourself as worthy, inherently valuable, and lovable. If you’re not there yet, take baby steps. Practice self-care, improve your diet and exercise routines, start journaling, get good sleep, do the things you need to function at your best energy levels every day.
Soon, you will start to see your daily outlook improve, and you will find the things you love about yourself. When you love yourself, you become strong naturally.
- Have Compassion
The next step is to find compassion in your heart. It is not only good for getting strong; it is also a good way to learn to love yourself more deeply. When we accept that everyone is always doing the very best they can in life, we can extend compassion to even the people who have harmed us.
Remember, having compassion does not mean allowing someone to hurt you. You can have compassion for someone and never see or speak to them again.
- Eliminate Toxins
You cannot be strong with toxins in your life making you weak. Look around you. Are you surrounded by toxins? Drugs, excessive alcohol, junk food, toxic people who spend their time complaining or playing out unhealthy cycles?
You have to eliminate the things, and yes, the people, making you sick before you can be healthy and strong. It’s a tough pill to swallow, but swallow it you must if you hope to be protected.
- Establish Boundaries
Even with people who are not toxic, you will have to learn to establish boundaries. Learn to say “no” when you mean no. Hold the line firmly but with love and compassion. It is perfectly acceptable to say “No. I don’t want to.”
You may even have to establish and hold boundaries with yourself. Your negative instincts want to give in to something unhealthy, and you will have to say no to yourself. “No. This will not make me strong. This will hurt me. No.”
- Start Building the Life You Love
Once you’ve put those first four building blocks into place, you can begin building the life you love. When you have a life you love, you will do anything to protect it. You will also gain even more self-love and confidence, which will make you increasingly stronger. It is a win/win/win.
Why am I telling you all of this? Why am I teaching you, asking you, to be strong? Because if you do not do these things and grow strong, build confidence, and learn to love yourself more than you love anyone else on earth, no stone for protection will do anything for you.
A stone, without your energy and focus, is just a stone.
A stone, with all of your energy and focus, is magic.
That’s how this works.
Best Stone to Wear for Protection
As you work on yourself, as you grow strong, and as you build the life you love, you can begin to collect the crystals that will amplify your strength and protect you from a range of negative energies.
Make no mistake, negative energy is very real, and people will send it your way, especially if you are happy, loving, and confident. Envy is an ugly emotion, and it begs to be spread.
Here are the top 5 stones to wear on your body to protect your energy as you grow strong.
- Black Obsidian
I love this one for absorbing all negative energy sent your way. It is highly absorptive and will draw in anything not good for you. Keep it on your body at all times when you are out in the world if you are dealing with someone who aims to harm you mentally, emotionally, or physically.
It serves as a reminder for you that love wins, always. Positive energy outmatches negative energy by a factor of 1,000. So, you can have 999 people shooting you with negativity, and if you can manage to stay positive, you win, every time. Black obsidian will help you catch all that negativity before it hits your heart.
Another great stone for drawing away negative energy, pyrite, also known as “fool’s gold,” is a detoxifier. If you are surrounded by toxic energy or toxic people, keep pyrite on you to assist you as you wash it all away, gently but firmly say goodbye to those people, flush your household toxins down the toilet, and even, perhaps, detox your own negative energy.
Pyrite is strong, and it will be strong for you as you build yourself up.
If you are healing from past hurts and hoping to protect yourself from being hurt again in the same way, amethyst is your crystal. With a range of healing properties, this stone will protect you from negative energy while providing you with the will to nurse your wounds.
It’s also great for when you around a ton of people and feel drained or overwhelmed. It will help you put on an energetic wet suit, where you can be with people but not feel every single emotion they exude.
If you’re struggling with fear and anxiety, citrine is your best friend. It will help you stay focused on the good in your life, remind you to keep your head up and stay positive, and protect you from the darkness that feels like it wants to swallow you whole sometimes.
It is a manifesting and abundance stone, so keep it on your body when you want to bring all the good into your life and ward off the bad, especially when there are negative people or situations in your life that you cannot avoid.
- Clear Quartz
One of my favorite stones, and one I recommend everyone have, is the clear quartz. It is a versatile amplifier of energy. It will show you truth and clarity when you need it most.
Keep a clear quartz with you at all times on the journey toward getting stronger, more loving, and more positive. It will show you the way. Just seek clarity on all issues, and this crystal will help you listen to your soul.
In the end, it is critical to remember that whatever power you seek, you already have within you. The stones do not provide you with something you do not already have. They remind you of just how powerful you are. Use them as tools to find that within yourself, and you will have all the protection you could ever possibly need.